"DEPORTED HODGEPODGE" WEDNESDAY!

1. July 24th is Amelia Earhart Day.  Earhart was the first female to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean.  What's something you've recently accomplished solo? 

     I have taken excellent care of SWMBO, driving her to work, picking her up again (very important!), completed some of the house cleaning chores, etc. 

2.  What's one product you use that never ever fails?

     This question is easy! Duct Tape of course! It never fails!

3. Have you found your place in the world? Where is it?

     I think that I have. I am pleased to be able to devote so much time to taking care of SWMBO. I also am privileged to be able to serve the church. I am remarkably content with where I am at this point in my life. I'm with SWMBO....everything else is gravy!

4.  Worst movie you ever saw?

     "Speed 2" comes to mind. Also, "Star Trek IV, The Voyage Home" was more tree hugging propaganda than entertainment. It is tied for that dishonor.

5. What's the last fun thing you did?

     SWMBO and I went to a local "fine dining" restaurant called the Bedford Village Inn to celebrate our wedding anniversary. That was a really good time!

6. The month of July is named for Roman Emperor Julius Caesar...ever been to Rome? What's your favorite Italian dish?

     I have never been to Rome. I did take two years of Latin in High School, but that's as close as I ever got. My favorite Italian dish is Sophia Loren! If you mean food...I love lasagna!

7. What is one piece of advice you'd offer new mom Kate Middleton?

     I would advise her to allow the new prince to be a boy. The burden of being a member of the royal family will come upon him way too soon. Let him enjoy the carefree nature of childhood for as long as is humanly possible. Try to keep him out of the limelight of the too invasive Press for as long as possible!

8.  Insert your own random thought here.

     Last week I mentioned that SWMBO and I got kicked out of Canada during our trip to Niagara Falls. Several people commented that they wanted to hear the story of how that happened.
     Well here is what happened. During our trip I wanted to visit a Duty Free Shop that can be found at several of the border crossings between Canada and the United States. There was such a shop on the U.S. side of the Friendship Bridge in Buffalo, NY. What I didn't know is that once you drive into the parking lot of the Duty Free Shop you could not exit back into Buffalo...you had to cross the bridge and enter Canada.

     So what's the problem? I'm glad you asked! First, neither SWMBO nor I had passports. All we had to identify ourselves were our NH Driver's Licenses. Second, we had the dogs with us and we did not have their shot records. Third, I was armed with a loaded .38 caliber revolver. (I generally carry a revolver with us when we travel, for protection)
     So we drive across the bridge and stop at the Canadian Customs Booth. The Customs Agent asked a series of questions that were quite innocuous, like..."Where were you born? Where do you live? Are you American citizens? Where are you going? What is your purpose in coming to Canada?" We had no problem with these questions. I explained how I mistakenly came to be at his customs booth. But then, he asked the 64 thousand dollar question, "Do you have any firearms with you?" Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Houston, we have a problem!
     I told him that I did have a loaded .38 caliber revolver. He paused...got this look like he didn't believe what he just heard...and repeated the question. I repeated my answer! He got this frightened look on his face, spoke discreetly into his lapel microphone and told me to drive to a parking space where several custom officials had just gathered in a tactical formation of sorts.
     Being the compliant sort, and noticing that the customs officers were well armed, I complied! Upon turning off my engine, a supervisor came to my window asked if I had a loaded firearm. I said "yes!" He asked why I was armed? I told him that I was an off-duty police officer and that I generally travelled with a loaded firearm. He asked me if I was aware of Canadian gun laws. I said I was generally familiar with them and that had I intended to come into Canada, I would have left the firearm secured at home but I had no intention of entering Canada.
     He asked me to surrender the firearm to him, which I safely did. He unloaded it and went inside the Station, presumably to speak with his supervisor and to conduct a records check on yours truly. While he was gone the other officers maintained their tactical positions keeping their gaze fixed upon me and my beloved SWMBO.

     After several minutes the supervisor returned to me and handed my revolver and the five rounds that were formerly loaded into the gun back to me. He said that I was not to reload it until I was back in the United States. He then kindly directed me back across the bridge towards the land of the free and the home of the brave.
     So that's the story about how I got kicked out of Canada! I'm sorry that it's a long story, but you asked for it! Enjoy your week!